How I “do it”

Raising eight is wonderful, and difficult, and both the most rewarding and the most challenging feat. It’s taught me what true patience is, and I’m not talking about needing to count to ten to gather myself or overcoming the urge to rush a retelling of events or the process of tying his own shoes… no, I’m talking about that longsuffering kind of patience as you wait for healing, heart change, or repentance. Patience that I really have no control over, but have learned to endure peacefully, without injection or interference. Truly waiting; hopefully and prayerfully. Accompanying children into adolescence is not for the faint of heart, and launching them into adulthood is again, wonderful and difficult, rewarding and challenging, freeing and sorrowful. My kids will shamelessly attest to my imperfections, and yes, I sure could have used a few do-over’s. Our home has been fun, and peace filled, and there have also been seasons when we have been overcome with chaos or anger. Etched in our family memories is an afternoon when we all booted up and marched around our home on Hodgkin’s Road and chanted “The Lloyd’s fought the battle of anger, anger, anger!” I continue to march; praying over my brood. Hoping in His redeeming grace for these precious sinners. I truly hate seeing the similar patterns, tendencies, and mistakes from my own life in these young humans that my heart couldn’t love any more. I am angry over the defeating and misguiding ways of this world. Oh, all the things they are destined to face and the decisions they will have to make. I know I can’t protect them from it all. I can’t make their decisions for them. And I know from experience that my arguments hold less weight when not delivered in the right time and the right ways. These acknowledgments are life giving. Parenting is hard. It’s so good. And it is so super fun. And it is so hard. At the end of the day all I can do is teach, and model, and repent and ask for forgiveness when I need to. I can show them the ropes and all the ways and have all the conversations. I can do it for them when they are young, and then I do it with them, and then prayerfully, I sit back and watch them try. And I can encourage them, and love them, and help them when I can and when it’s invited, and I can pick them up when it’s helpful and it’s appropriate. People ask me all the time, “how do you do it?” Somedays I don’t. Not well. Somedays are good. Every day is with the grace that comes from the unconditional love of God. Every day is a new day filled with new mercies and new opportunities. For them, and for me, and for you.